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 | |  I showed your mom a 50 foot ape last night. That's right, I got the life size plushie bitches
Posted on Friday 16Dec05, at 3:04 am. | | |
A little more back story, maybe this explains a little more about Tristain. Or, maybe, confuses you more. I don't know, I don't care.
You know, at first I hadn't noticed that her name is Princess Perenia Polarias. I mean, EVENTUALLY, this occurred to me, but during this writing it never crossed my mind. Apparently, I have something with this letter, especially considering I once named something "The 4P Project." Ah, but that's old news.
First off, here's a big Fuck You to all the people who force me to play Halo and Halo 2. The game was never good. Fuck all of you who dare call this pile of shit the greatest game ever made. Do you realize you're doing -exactly- the same shit for 20 hours straight? With NO variation at all? I was all excited when I first played Halo, but then the beautiful veneer faded and I was left with this...thing. Man, fuck Halo, seriously.
I got the outright pleasure of being the first person in Austell to see King Kong. Not even the Regal managers had seen it when I saw it. See, they were giving it a test run before any of them actually watched it, and me and Zack showed up just in time to see it, purely by coincidence.
First off, this is really the sort of movie that, in a perfect world, everyone would see in theatres with their closest friends. It's a Peter Jackson flick, so obviously you already know the visuals will be outstanding. The action, as well, was pretty tight. God bless the scene where King Kong takes on three T-Rex. That was like the fucking cage match of the century. Absolutely beautiful.
I did have problems with the movie though. Namely, there were so many scenes that just did not need to be there. Some were cute, and I know he was trying to appeal to our emotions with a lot of them, to make us feel for the beast. Instead, it feels like getting over the head with scenes like King Kong ice skating on his ass.
Look, the original did not have to beat the message into our heads like this one did. Humans are the real animals. Humans are the evil here. We went to his house, fucked with his shit, DRAGGED him here, TAUNTED him with a beautiful woman, and were surprised when he started fucking shit up? Come on.
Jack Black did have a great performance in this one though. He comes off as totally fucking batty. Rack on, you deranged bastard. He just has this look in his eyes through the whole film, the kind that wants to say "if cutting you to small pieces would make me a movie...I'd do it."
Also, to the makers of Swordfish, I have a request. Simple request, really. Can you make a special edition release, that's nothing but Hally Berry's titties? Because, you know, that was the only good scene in the entire movie. | |
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Although I never understood why that phrase exists. Whatever you do first IS first, right?
Anyway, I enjoyed Swordfish, and Hallie Berry's tits, while not bad to look at, certainly didn't make the movie.
Anyway.
Tristian is possibly the character I enjoy most, and not because of yaoi. Mostly because his reactions would be the same as mine, such as shooting a hyperdrive to make it work and shoving a zombie out the airlock.
Would definately make the snide comment. But I'd've probably walked away earlier.
Ender | |
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Rather defensive are we?
- Comic | |
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| | Halo IS so very overrated.
Posted on Thursday 22Dec05, at 2:33 am. by an anonymous mook | |
Your comic kicks copious amounts of ass. Keep up the good work. | |
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Who names a self-dependant colony a halo?
Hells, who makes a self-depenant colony into a ring shape so they can call it a halo?
My younger brother (Gods how I'll kill him!) is apparently a big halo fan. He says it's a different game every time you play it, and it doesn't lose its luster.
Uhm, right. How in the Nine Hells is going around shooting things different every time? You just run. Jump. Shoot. Try not to get shot. Repeat. Gah.
Must... kill... younger brother siblings.....
Fucking zombies.
Ender | |
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While I don't agree that Halo is TERRIBLE, I will agree that it did not live up to the hype. Everyone was saying about how it revolutionized the FPS genre. Friends, the FPS genre hasn't been updated since Goldeneye. I'm sorry, but it's the damn truth. First Person Shooters are the same ten seconds over and over and over again. It may be a fun ten seconds, but it gets boring after a while. And don't argue that with me. Even one of the developers said so in a making of Halo 2 video. So suck a dick, I win. Bitches.
HALO PWNZ00rz3s!!!!!!!one!!1!1111!!uno!
Or not. | |
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| |  Re: HALO Bashing
Posted on Friday 23Dec05, at 4:37 am. | | |
Let it be known that I now love every single one of you glorious bastards. | |
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You know, if you guys don't like Halo, what FPSes do you play? I picked up Snowblind and KillZone, but I don't really like them. Snowblind is just kinda... You have all these weapons, but almost all the time the one you got at the start is the best one to use. With Killzone the problem is that everything, from reloading to walking shakes the screen up so bad you can't aim, not that it matters since none of the weapons seem to be able to hit things that aren't right in front of you, which is fine because with all the damn fog, and and...
So what games should I pick up? | |
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Time Crisis 3 is fun the first time around if you have the gun controller. (It has ninjas! ^_^)
The bosses are kind of weird sometimes though. Like in the second part you have to fight to guys who's names are "Wild Fang" and "Mad Dog" or something like that. And everytime "Wild Fang" says his name it sounds like he's saying "Wild Fag" o_O
But after you beat the actual game you get to play a longer version of the game that happens before the actual game storywise called "rescue mission". You play as a supportive female character where you actually get to use a sniper rifle! (In the game you can only use handgun/machinegun/shotgun/grenadelauncher) So it's kind of like switching between a "POWPOWPOWDIEDIEDIE" type thing to a MSG-type "stay silent and kill them before they notice" thing.
Then you get to do training missions. Why do they let you unlock training missions AFTER you've beaten both versions of the game?
All in all it's fun, the levels have a little variety, often introducing new enemies or using old enemies in new ways (Like in the first level the ninjas come up out of the ground to hit you, but then in a later level when you're in a car one jumps off the front of a motorcycle being driven by a generic troop onto your truck and ninja-slashes you)
The game only has one view, which is first person. So it's not like Halo where you switch camera angles and see yourself shooting. Also you cant move. Every time you kill a screenful of enemies it goes into a cutscene with you moving about 10 feet to another hiding place with another screenful of enemies then it yells ACTION and you shoot em all up.
It's not really "better" than Halo persay, but it's a different type of FPS so if you're looking for variety it should help break up the monotony a little. But you HAVE to have the gun controller to make it fun. Otherwise it sucks.
Overall, I'd give it a 7/10. It dosen't suck...it's not really good...it's just...different. | |
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| | Fried Potato Sack...? Fourth Pigeon Statue...? Wha?
Posted on Monday 26Dec05, at 10:49 pm. | | |
Half-Life 2 is the only dedicated FPS I've really enjoyed... though by association of "constantly look through the character's eyes and shoot everything that moves" Metroid Prime (the first one) is far more awesome, and the Thief series comes in at a third. | |
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Posted on Monday 26Dec05, at 11:51 pm. | | |
Oh, let's see, good first person shooters...
Unreal Tournament
Return to Castle Wolfenstein
Doom 3
and uh...what was that? Time Splinter? I can't recall the name, but you got to shoot monkeys, I remember that.
Oh, and Time Crisis...you unlock training because it's originally an arcade game, and a DAMN FINE arcade game. It's my game of choice, followed by DDR, and Initial D (it's the drift, baby!).
If you haven't played Time Crisis in the arcades, you are missing out on one of the finer joys in life. | |
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| | Turok, N64
Posted on Sunday 23Apr06, at 8:23 pm. by Nightshade | |
Yeah, I went there | |
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Applicable material © DG
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